Out of a sudden, I am being thrown aside... alone....
I cannt go home for the fear of stabbing myself to death.....

last 5 weekdays... last 5 weekdays (it might be even lesser...) more to go before its a bye...
I cannt do anything at all... but to just watch it pass seconds by seconds....
And i cannt do anything anything anything at all...
helpless is the only word to describe my feeling now...
5 more days and maybe not even 1 night is mine.... maybe 1 for now... but there might be changes as that day comes nearer

on the train home just now, I cant help but to sob quietly in the last cabin....
Ignoring all the stares i get from the freaking people... i could help but to let my tears roll down...

now sitting here on the floor.... i cannt control it again... sth just hurts... so badly...
i tot we can exchange like thousands of sentences again online... but...
our conversations revolved only on the phone.. thats the only common topic, only topic now...
I have to put on a facial mask to cover... away frm mum, away from uncle, away frm brother....